PSYCHOLOGICAL FREEDOM

Would you like to feel fulfilled in your existence? I refer to the word “existence” considerably as it encompasses from being born to senior stages of our lives. I am aware that it is important to stretch our perception of time once in a while, otherwise, we might get too stuck in particular unhelpful and unkind details and negative behavioural cycles. I am sharing below 5 suggestions concerning how you can achieve psychological freedom.

1. It is vital to realise what your real desires are, so you don’t keep making decisions that don’t contribute to your happiness. When you repeat what you don’t want, you are bringing heavy and about to burst clouds to a sunny territory.

2. It is necessary to ground on universal principles, ethics and in elements of organic productivity. In relationships, this means being brave to acknowledge our emotions and current viewpoints, while allowing space for further reflection, learning and self-discovery. For instance starting a conversation with ” I now feel ______ and my stance is ______, even though it may change if appropriate”. By adopting this communication style you give yourself the time and freedom to re-examine and evolve your discoveries. Personal flexibility is kindness.

3. Everyone has the right to feel safe and healthy. Our minds have to be prioritised as they determine how we think about our general well-being and others. Being safe is not only about experiencing physical safety but also psychological, in other words, It is extremely important to not get used to experiencing feeling unvalued, disrespected and judged.

4. Overcome fear and embrace your valid views. Humankind is so on edge when it comes to taking an assertive stand and verbalising accurate and present emotions. Isn’t this the only way to freedom?

5. The ultimate positioning is when the world becomes a place of genuine interactions and when self-respect and self-introspection are the pillars, and joyful experiences the consequence.

PSYCHOLOGICAL SINGULARITY FOR PARENTS OF CHILDREN WITH AUTISM AND INTELLECTUAL DISABILITY

Parents are the pillars of our world as they have the very important roles of protecting, caring and educating their children, and inadvertently helping professionals to become better at their jobs.

In my view parents require to acknowledge their need for personal space and self-care too. When they do this everyone in the household increases their self-awareness and consequently self-worth.

The key points are that parents realise that they might have been dismissing the guidance available to them: their emotions. The exhaustion they experience sometimes (or often), indicates a diversion from their own self-love path. I see this happening significantly in my work as clinical psychologist, as normally other demands and worries take priority.

I work mainly with parents of autistic children and I witness great potential and love coming from them; however, I also notice reluctance and insecurity when it comes to trusting themselves first. This is perhaps due to longstanding beliefs related to the topic of autism or learning disabilities, parenthood, individual narratives and social expectations. Parents require to remember that their lives are equally important, and that they deserve to mind the gap between their thoughts and their actions, and enhance their sensitivity to the way they feel.

If you are a parent of a child with autism you will most likely experience ambivalent and puzzling emotions.

Most people raise the theme of rigidity, and need to stick to a routine to not intensify anxiety on the child, which in many ways is positive because it provides the physical and emotional safety and the secure attachment that they are entitled to. However, it is likewise relevant that parents remember the importance of space for personal reflection and to not suppress creative and spontaneous behaviour.

Scientists of psychology have carried out extensive research that confirms the impact of social conditioning which is interconnected with how parents have been also brought-up and their exposure to education. If you have come from a chaotic family, or a high achieving one, you might not have been reminded to appreciate your emotional states. I’ve seen many times parents flourishing when we initiate discussion about the principle of self-worth. Very quickly they become quite creative and insightful, and able to troubleshoot challenging situations at home with minimal or none support.

I would like to recommend that parents become more attentive to their emotions, and to take a non-judgemental stance even if these emotions are convoluted, such as anger or serious frustration. Instead see yourself as extremely valuable and also an emotional being that is deserving of unconditional respect and self-love.

Take a deep breath and re-connect with the purpose of your existence in this magnificent planet that supersedes the mind blocks and any unpleasant emotions.

Article written by Dr Andreia Santo (April 2020)