The times we face are interesting and strongly synchronised with the collective homeostasis, not just the earth, but with our physiology, ethics and morality.
Human beings have been trespassers because they can’t seem to be able to wait in the line but instead, they jump queues or stop to look or admire what other people are doing which results in them abandoning their magnificent singular growth temporarily. Like a traffic jam where traffic lights are not respected, and instead, the drivers go in front of each other causing delays and inconvenience, and sometimes they don’t carry the kindest intentions at heart.
The examples of trespassing are:
To inflict unnecessary pain on others
To be dishonest in order to achieve recognition
To copy someone’s work and profit from it
To criticise people harshly and make them feel humiliated, etc…
I see that the current times are asking people to take a slower approach in life. How can we not do it? The benefits are numerous:
Increase care and compassion
Better union and laws
No jumping ahead, and instead analysis of singular present moment
We must honour what makes us so unique. We are intelligent corpora that have cognitive faculties that have been neglected. This, unfortunately, resulted in the violation of human rights throughout the many timelines and social epochs, and sadly still occurs. As we slow down and understand our bio-psycho-social existence, it is only likely that we can and will reap much higher long-term meaningful results.
I know it may sound strange this title and rude; however it equally encourages us all to cherish our deliberation, ability to take a step back to think, to flow with our joy and to speak up! This statement is critical if you find yourself engulfed in family, social and professional or school expectations and demands. If you feel lonely and that no one is interested in what you have to say is because you also perceive your voice as being weaker. Recognise that us humans are susceptible to get carried away in people’s dramas because of the intensity of the moment. This is natural. Be kind and a responsible adult during that time, and get used to loving yourself, by taking time out and remembering to prioritise your rhetoric, logic and free will. In my view, no matter how old we are, we ought to esteem our personal existence, uniqueness and freedom to learn and to speak up.
I am a believer that ethics as a concept is older than the concept of psychology or mental health. It is evident if you look back in history. Even in the ancient religious scripts, people have been asked to refrain their judgement, crime, and lies. So why are some humans compulsive liars, for example? I am not dismissing at all the genetic inclination for particular thinking patterns and actions; I actually embrace it wholeheartedly. It is important to recognise the vulnerabilities and weaknesses of the heart or mind, but something really different is when individuals hide it and minimise it.
Certain human beings prefer reading gossip magazines although they know that judgement is wrong and they dwell in the joy of either belittling themselves or others in their minds: “this person is fatter than me, I could be on the front page! For example. There is still quite a lot of this mentality but small education on it. In the meantime, young women and men with this predisposition start developing eating disorders or obsessive and compulsive habits. How many times have I worked with parents of children that were in constant denial of their emotional displacement. “We speak about everything in this house,” they say; however, they cannot bear to talk about their emotional wounds from the past, without a lot of necessity present and encouragement.
In my view, our world requires to have a stronger baseline of ethics before anything else, instead of being guided by lies of consumerism, power and fame. Immediate gratification is not to be neglected by doctors and services; it is to be tackled in conversations if we spot it and to be addressed in the now. The immediate gratification is the root of addiction, compulsion, obsession, depression and aggression. We must crystallise our personal ethics before we open any magazine or watch the news next time.
Processing speed is a faculty in the brain that requires to be exercised to operate comprehensively. Processing speed is the velocity at which a person takes in information, makes sense of it, and begins to answer. This information can be visual, like letters and numbers. It can also be auditory, like spoken language. Different people have different paces in processing information. Our communication depends on our ability to process information effectively, and to notice the subtleties of the relational exchange, which include the following:
A= Personal ability to notice effectively what people are expressing and a frank attitude to acknowledge what you understand or when you need to ask for clarification.
B= Personal ability to state the truth, without fear of persecution or oppression.
C= Personal ability to recognise how we feel in the moment, and commitment to universal rights.
Most arguments and conflicts happen due to a need to slow down the thinking to serve a better reflection and impartiality. The truth is always important for both parts, as it is essentially based in unconditional love. This powerful statement is beyond what we imagine currently, because it has the potential to support each individual in their emotional and mental calibration and self-awareness. This could be very protective for humanity.
Imagine a debate where people are only attacking each other with the things that they have failed upon, without punctuating how to make it better, as it is the debate of the American Presidential elections and a common practice of many politicians. This is an overreactive mentality, which aim does not seem to support the collective good for all, especially when the vice-presidents keep telling each other that they are lying, without explaining if they are or not and rushing to the next question instead. This can be felt as extremely confusing and deceptive, and it is! Assuming that “everyone knows it all” is the norm, which is unhealthy and detrimental to our mental health.
We must enquire deeper in the debate between 2 individuals, including on how they are achieving their reasoning and how they feel about it. Besides, we must demand facts as they are many vulnerable people with poor processing speed that are not prepared to think with complete self-care and attention to the important and truthful details. When there is anxiety in the mind while saying something, there will be space for error. Unfortunately, denial is also a problem because it is a common action and acceptable socially, which is again conceivably harmful.
Dear reader, let me ask you kindly. How dedicated are you in terms of taking responsibility for your own mental health? How much do you value it from zero to ten (none to a lot)? If you don’t value unconditional self-love and prioritise your well-being that much, it may indicate that your processing speed is rather slow in the matters of your own holistic self-care. I want to reassure you that it is possible to overcome this issue through specific researched interventions.
Please refer to my other articles and posts of my professional and personal Instagram for more openness on this subject, and feel free to approach me if you wish to book a session or have questions.
The words “self-love” and “unconditional self-love” are experienced by many as archaic or even not representing a priority. This is noticeable because what you hear the most on social media and the television are not those words. I use this terminology in my clinical practice because it is not only intertwined with the purpose of emotional healing and rehabilitation but also with ancient facts that few Masters of unconditional love and peace have tried to disseminate for millennia.
When you love yourself unconditionally, you know that in every step of your way, you will need to re-examine your heart and mind intentions, thoughts and actions. Unconditional self-love to me is a broader understanding that we are beyond meanings; it grounds me immediately to my entitlements of experiencing joy and keep evolving without the fear of being judged. There is much social anxiety on this planet, too much. This has been sustained, and the only thing that can reduce it is the use of logic and authenticity
I have sad news for you. Your life circumstances are a product of your great or little attention to your well-being. You have abandoned knowing yourself to facilitate “happier” moments to other people. Have you? If not, congratulations.
Please stop blaming your spouse, children, parents and the economy, and allow yourself to feel more dignified. It is your care to the detail and pursuit of your happiness that are here in check.
Perhaps your difficulty is related to inertia or lethargy. If you feel stuck in your conditions than I recommend that you learn how to overcome the negative feelings from an easy and kind place. How can you defeat emotional lethargy? I have one simple and life-saving suggestion: don’t judge yourself and move on. Indeed move on with your new understanding and greater feeling, and reach your next important milestone which might be feeling healthier, inspired, energetic, satisfied, in love, in harmony, etc. Simply move on to a new positive feeling platform, even before you address trauma if you have endured it, feel good if not excellent first. Discover what is that you love and surround yourself with that.
What is life but a multitude of occurrences as a result of mentalities and belief systems?
Most people still unwillingly ride waves of despair, disempowerment and victimisation. They submit to the understanding people assign to their experiences.
I know that this is a fragility in almost all personalities, I have been there myself. There is a natural inclination in the mind to react when faced with varied attitudes. This happens because the core identity feels threatened by the negative connotations that others want to impose on us. At the end of the day, it is a mechanism of survival and proving our points.
It is not fair at all when people with negative intent make us feel hostages of their ideas, rules and assumptions. I see this happening in families quite frequently. Nevertheless one needs to ask what makes us prisoners? Is it others or our interpretations and reactions to situations?
I choose to give chances to individuals that have a passive-aggressive style as they also wish to learn to self-regulate (inadvertently), although, I only give them maximum 3 chances depending on their conduct. It is important to not allow direct aggression from anyone, but we all desire to make this world a better place and for this particular reason we have been allowing verbal and psychological abuse from many. It is time to put an end to this insanity, and have a smarter response.
I believe in equal rights and use them in my work often. Every single person, no matter how old they are, need to be fully listened to, and their views deserve to be congruently examined against the standards of universal truth.
“Love others as you love yourself”. If you don’t love yourself you can’t love others. My advice is that we should be tolerant, patient and ready to listen to all the valid reasons and weigh the facts in light with ethical and moral values. This would reduce victimisation thinking and behavioural patterns.
This world requires a stronger and more sustained holding of moral and ethical principles in all contexts.
Quantum physics is a science that investigates the smallest and most invisible and imperceptible elements that surround our existence, such as atoms, molecules, waves, etc.
I based my work and clinical approach on unconditional self-love which is the scientific self of all humans. Throughout the last decade of practicing as a clinical psychologist, I concluded that the mind cannot remain in one place, as it is quickly transported to varied emotional experiences, some of them experienced physically and others related to imagined or vicarious learning. In my work, I remind individuals of all ages about the many parallel roads that they tend to get stuck on, and are diverted from their original goal which tends to be feeling their confidence, authenticity, happiness, power, and/ or motivation. I also remind them of the intact and positive self that stays normally at the back, asking to be reunited with the mind, with the single purpose of living a fulfilled and meaningful life.
The self I am constantly referring to is the genuine identity that obeys to the laws of unconditional self-love, and it is basically comprised of energy, one of positive nature.
Imagine a glass filled with water, pure water, and suddenly you add a minuscule drop of blue ink, the water will no longer seem so transparent. This is exactly what I mean by unconditional self-love energy. It is a quantum reality, invisible; however at the basis on all creation because it never disentangles from the systems of homeostasis, regeneration, and therefore peace and joy.
Would you like to feel fulfilled in your existence? I refer to the word “existence” considerably as it encompasses from being born to senior stages of our lives. I am aware that it is important to stretch our perception of time once in a while, otherwise, we might get too stuck in particular unhelpful and unkind details and negative behavioural cycles. I am sharing below 5 suggestions concerning how you can achieve psychological freedom.
1. It is vital to realise what your real desires are, so you don’t keep making decisions that don’t contribute to your happiness. When you repeat what you don’t want, you are bringing heavy and about to burst clouds to a sunny territory.
2. It is necessary to ground on universal principles, ethics and in elements of organic productivity. In relationships, this means being brave to acknowledge our emotions and current viewpoints, while allowing space for further reflection, learning and self-discovery. For instance starting a conversation with ” I now feel ______ and my stance is ______, even though it may change if appropriate”. By adopting this communication style you give yourself the time and freedom to re-examine and evolve your discoveries. Personal flexibility is kindness.
3. Everyone has the right to feel safe and healthy. Our minds have to be prioritised as they determine how we think about our general well-being and others. Being safe is not only about experiencing physical safety but also psychological, in other words, It is extremely important to not get used to experiencing feeling unvalued, disrespected and judged.
4. Overcome fear and embrace your valid views. Humankind is so on edge when it comes to taking an assertive stand and verbalising accurate and present emotions. Isn’t this the only way to freedom?
5. The ultimate positioning is when the world becomes a place of genuine interactions and when self-respect and self-introspection are the pillars, and joyful experiences the consequence.